What I’ve experienced without much experience

Being a woman in your 20’s is hard. You’re recently fully independent, figuring out what you want to do career wise, meeting people post-grad is quite difficult, and men suck. Everything is new. Living in a new place or at home, you’re exploring something new, whether it’s a city or managing a new relationship of living with your parents post-grad. Everyone’s story is different but there are some ideas I have thought of that I wanted to share. I’ve made a list and I hope it makes sense and is actually helpful.

• You are the only person in charge of your life. Do whatever you want! No one is stopping you from doing anything your heart desires so do whatever you would like!

• One of the only things out of our control is time, so make the most of it. I’ve recently realized the real meaning of ‘you only live once’. Live your life to the fullest and do everything, especially while you’re young!

• Always prioritize yourself. If you aren’t feeling up to going out with your friends over the weekend, never hesitate to say no. I think a lot of people our age are people pleasers and are nervous to say no to hanging out with friends because they don’t want to seem lame or disappoint their friends. But, sometimes at the end of the day all you want to do is lay in bed and watch TV while you’re scrolling through every app on your phone and end your peaceful night with a nice book. Put yourself before everything. Mental health is no joke and you don’t want to wear yourself out. Do what recharges you. 

• Figure out what you want to do career wise. Keep in mind that nothing is set in stone. There are a million different kinds of jobs in this world and I recommend doing the research to find what you really want to do. If you have a degree, you don’t necessarily have to limit yourself to what you studied in school. I studied sociology and upon further research I learned I want to be involved in the food industry.

  • Mentors. When you are figuring out what you want to do career wise, I recommend finding the people who are doing that job. Reach out and offer to meet for coffee. I have used this time to ask questions about how this person got to where they are in their career and how they built their brand. It’s helpful to hear a variety of stories, make connections, and it leads to such helpful advice. 

• Do new things around your city. If you’re living in a new city or back in your hometown, try new things! Whether it’s food, a walk, a museum, etc, explore! You never know where your new favorite thing is hiding! I wish that I explored the other parts of my city sooner!

• People come and go. Throughout my life, I’ve made some great friends. I thought they were going to be there for the rest of my life. But things change and people grow. Whether you grow out of each other, they did you dirty or physical distance separated you, it’s ok to lose friends. Sometimes it hurts more than heartbreak, but it helps you grow as a person.

• Confidence is key. Surrounding yourself with people who allow you to be your most true and authentic self. It will help you gain so much confidence and it is absolutely for the best.

• Work and life. Sometimes it’s hard to not feel like work is your life. I currently work a 9-5 desk job and I can confidently say it is not for me. But what keeps me going is doing little things throughout the week. Going out to dinner/spending time with friends and having a project to work on that doesn’t feel like work (all the time)(this website, diamond painting, etc) are my favs. 

• Boys are out, men are in. Playing games is boring and tiring. Be with someone who makes you confident in your relationship.

• Celebrate achievements. Sometimes all I want for the little wins in life are sushi and doughnuts. And that’s all I need. Give yourself a little treat!